


The War of Words

by KayDiggsWriting



Series: What Happens In France... [7]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Arguing, Breakups, But things are better, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Feelings, Flashbacks, Hamgelica, Heavy Angst, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I'm Still Bad At Tagging, Past Relationship(s), Sick Character, Unresolved Emotional Tension, like a lot of arguing, not exactly happy ending, parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-08
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-14 05:28:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14763504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KayDiggsWriting/pseuds/KayDiggsWriting
Summary: Angelica tried to stay away from Alexander. She really did. She was doing everything she promised her sister she would. She didn't see Alexander at all. There were no calls, no video chats, no messaging. Angelica didn't even allow herself to think about the man. It was all working out perfectly....for the first ten days.Or, Alexander and Angelica finally have the talk they should have had three years ago.





	The War of Words

**Author's Note:**

> I loved writing this chapter so fucking much. I'm a sucker for dramatic Hamgelica. If you have come to this update looking for happiness and romance, please leave now. You will be disappointed. It's not all sad but it's not really happy either. Just two emotionally tense adults finally getting to say what's on their chest.
> 
> As always, my apologies for grammar and spelling errors. I'm a writer not an editor, people!
> 
> Enjoy...

Angelica tried to stay away from Alexander. She really did. She was doing everything she promised her sister she would. It all worked out perfectly for the first ten days. She lived her life as she did before they were re-introduced. Working and coming home to care for Philip. And when the boy wanted to see his father- or visa versa- Peggy would pick him up and drop him off. A perfectly safe system. 

She didn't see Alexander at all. There were no calls, no video chats, no messaging. Angelica didn't allow herself to think about the man. Well... that wasn't completely true. While she could control her actions, attempting to control her thoughts was a different story. It was annoying how frequently her mind roamed to those big, dark eyes and that cheeky upturn of his lips. It seemed like the harder she tried to forget him, the more he invaded her head. There were a handful of nights she woke in a cold sweat, just a thought away from lifting up her phone and making the biggest mistake of her life. 

Her conscious never failed at being quick enough to stop her. 

After all he was still Elizabeth's boyfriend. Yes, the breakfast meeting was a disaster. But through the mist of scorned feelings, confessions and harsh words, there wasn't technically a break up. It could be assumed that her little sister rushing from the table and telling Alexander not to follow was the end of their relationship. But that could have also been the shock talking. Maybe Alexander called Elizabeth up that night for a more private apology. Maybe her sister gave in and decided to forgive him. Maybe they made up and laughed about how stupid they were to let a three year old relationship come between them.

Because the last time Angelica checked, they were still living together in Alexander's apartment. Eliza hadn't asked to crash at her place. Their middle sister damn sure wouldn't want to live with Peggy. Their parents lived too far away for her work commute. She  _had_ to be residing with him. There was no way she could remain up in arms if they were under the same roof. Alexander was too charming, too persuasive, too manipulative to have not drawn the woman who loved him back into his good graces. 

Of course all of that was speculation. Philip being away with his father left her nothing but free time to think about it. She could do the mature thing and just ask her younger sister how things were between them. But Eliza, in her fragile emotional state, might take that to mean something more than it actually did. She would think Angelica asked for selfish reasons instead of the truth. Which was Angelica making sure her sister was happy. So she stayed ignorant too all things Alexander. And all things Eliza and Alexander.

That was until Philip got sick.

It started with a small cough that morning. Angelica tossed some cold medicine between breakfast and lunch hoping it would do the trick. Then she noticed the sniffling. Within two hours her usually erratically active boy was a pathetic mess on the couch. The television was tuned into his favorite show. Yet not even the action packed pup adventures of the Paw Patrol gang could hold his attention. His tired eyes stared off into space as if he were thinking something philosophical. Beads of sweat formed between his furrowed eyebrows. Angelica was about to check the thermostat to make sure the house wasn't too warm when her boy declared,

"Mommy, I'm very cold. Get my blanket."

"Cold?" She repeated, eyeing the sweat. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. Get my blanket please."

"I will. Just let mommy see something." Angelica reached over to place the back of her hand on his forehead. Already knowing what to expect before their skin touched. Philip was hot. Instinctively she lifted her son off the couch. Pulling him into the comfort of her arms. His skin flamed every part of her it touched. "Philip, do you feel bad? Does something hurt?"

"I'm sleepy." His yawn emphasized his point. 

"Okay, baby."

That was fine. That was good. She could feed him another teaspoon of medicine and with any luck he'd sleep the thing off.

That worked for a couple of hours. Until he woke up from what was probably a fever dream. His small frame twisted uncomfortably in the sheets. A strained whine slipped from his lips. The kind that occurred seconds before a crying fit. Angelica rushed from the chair where she'd been monitoring him. Fully prepared to console him.

"Mommy." The word was called through a sleepy haze. His eyes remained shut. His little hands grabbed towards her blindly.

"Shh." She rubbed the strands sticking to his forehead away from his face. Trying to keep her voice at a calming whisper. "Mommy's here."

"Mommy." Philip reached out again. This time she wrapped her fingers over his. "I want daddy."

The three words were a slap to the face. She fought the urge to pull her hand from his. Her boy was sick with a fever of 101. It would be stupid to take his request personally. To twist it to mean he would prefer his father taking care of him. Sometimes Angelica was stupid. Philip had known Alexander for a few months, he knew his mother his entire life. She was the one who always nursed him back to health. Hearing he would rather his father caused an unwanted feeling to surge through her chest. 

First Alexander didn't want her. Now Philip. She should have known he'd come in and take everything. That was the Alexander Hamilton way.

Her son should not and would not travel the distance to his father's house in his condition. So she came up with a quick plan to have Peggy keep an eye on him while she disappeared for a few hours. That way she wouldn't be in the house when Alexander stopped by to care for Philip. It wasn't the best plan but it was all she had. Angelica dialed her baby sister and waited through the ringing. The abrupt automatic voice message system led her to believe her call was ignored. She tried again and got the same result. Fine. Next she tried Eliza's cell. Getting the same result she did with Peggy. What were the odds that both of her sisters were too busy to answer her calls?

Shit. Shit.  _Shit._  

"Philip, baby." She cooed to her frowning son. "Daddy can't come right now."

And boy was  _that_ the wrong thing to say. Philip's eyes opened. There was a lost look in them as he adjusted away from the darkness of his lids. When he locked in on his mother they warned of the storm that was brewing inside of him. A full thirty seconds of strained silence passed between them before he began screaming his head off.

"DADDY! DADDY! I WANT DADDY!" The volume seemed to stain his little throat.

Angelica went into full fledged panic parent mode. Allowing him to be upset was a dangerous stress on his already weakened body. His temperature could rise and the cause would be his own temper. God, why did he have to have his father's fiery temper? She couldn't risk that when her baby was a degree away from needing hospital attention. She realized it was either give the boy what he wanted or make a doctor's visit. The phone was ringing in her ear without her realizing she made a decision. Unlike the other calls, this one rung twice. 

"Angel?"

"Don't call me that."

"Why are you- I thought we couldn't... Is something the matter?"

So Eliza explained the rules to him as well. "Philip is sick."

"What?" Angelica could hear shuffling in the background. When Alexander spoke again he sounded more worried than she anticipated. "What do you mean sick? What's wrong with my son?" His voice rose an octave before cracking.

"It's a fever."

"Oh god." More shuffling. "What hospital is he in?"

"He's not quite there yet-"

"Take him to the hospital. I'll meet you there."

"Alexander-"

"Call an ambulance. We don't know how bad it is." And then lower. "We never know until it's too late."

"Alexander, calm down!" Angelica snapped before he could put her into a matching frenzy. "I think it's just a cold. I'm not taking him to a hospital yet. He just wants his father. I know you can hear him crying for you."

Alexander was silent as he listened to her background for the first time. "I hear him. Tell him daddy's coming. Tell him I'll be there in no time."

In hindsight, Angelica should have seen that coming.

 

_There was something to be said about the way Alexander looked wearing a black tuxedo._

_And that something was DAMN!_

_Angelica didn't fall in love with the man because of his looks but they sure didn't hurt the cause. She was used to seeing her boyfriend walk around in his suit for work. But his outfit for the night was something different. The tux fit his form perfectly. The jacket stretched over the length of his shoulders to make them look broad without making the fabric strain. His slacks showcased his toned thighs. The cut of the pants making him appear to be taller than he actually was. His bow-tie had yet to be folded properly around his throat. It hung freely around the collar of his shirt._

_Seeing him walk in looking red carpet ready was almost enough to make her forget she looked the opposite._

_Almost._

_Meanwhile her gold chain was starting to feel like a noose around her neck. The silk gown she spent hours looking for in the boutique earlier that day became suffocating. Sweat frizzed her professionally twisted hair beyond repair an hour ago. Her heels were thrown across the room, having been abandoned ten minutes before that. Angelica felt absolutely horrid. Her joy and excitement for the evening ahead died when the nausea started late in the afternoon. She couldn't take a solid fifteen steps away from the bathroom before her hand was clasped over her mouth again._

_Her boyfriend didn't hesitate in dropping to his knees beside her. Dangerously close to the spatter on the toilet bowl. Her heart fluttered in her chest when she felt his thin fingers tangle in her hair. Pulling the ever growing curls back from her face. Angelica chanced a glance at him. Shocked to see that he wasn't wearing a look of resigned disgust. Alexander stared back at her with nothing but concern and confusion._

_"When did this happen?" The palm of his free hand was held against her forehead. "You're burning up." He let his hand slide down to cradle her cheek._

_To avoid speaking in his face with vomit scented breath, she turned her head to the opening. "Almost two hours ago."_

_"Two hours?" He outraged. His hand unintentionally tightened In her hair and she winced. "Why didn't you tell me? I was waiting outside of the hotel for you."_

_"I couldn't get to the phone. I can't leave the bathroom." To bring her point home her stomach chose that moment to push bile up her throat. Alexander snatched his hand back just in time. The taste it left in her mouth was worse than it was in the beginning. She wasn't even throwing up the contents in her stomach anymore. Her body had been rid of that early on in the bathroom session. Now she was mostly dry heaving and spewing out something mildly acidic. "And I didn't want to ruin your evening."_

_"Ruin my even- Angelica, are you out of your mind? My evening was ruined the moment you didn't show up. You've been vomiting for over an hour. It's time for you to get to a hospital."_

_She groaned miserably. "I don't want to go to a hospital."_

_"Then it's a good thing I didn't ask what you wanted to do."_

_That was rewarded with a look that would have been more effective if her eyes weren't sunken in. "I am not going to the hospital."_

_"Yes you are."_

_"I don't want to-"  
_

_"You're going to the fucking hospital!" Alexander's scream was unexpected enough to startle Angelica. On instinct she shied away from him. Her head moving too quickly and causing her hair to be pulled by the grip he still had on her curls. Alexander let them go as soon as he realized this. If Angelica were in a healthier state the rise of his voice would have been the start of an ugly argument. But alas, she wasn't. So all she could will herself to do was frown._

_"Do not yell at me." Her voice was hoarse from the abuse of her throat._

_"Do you have any idea how selfish it is for you to refuse hospital care? There are people in certain parts of the world who would sell their souls to have a decent doctor at their disposal. There are people who get sick and have to weather it alone in dark, stuffy rooms because they can't afford treatment. There are people on the ugly side of America who are dying, who are dead, because they don't get the opportunities you do for health care. How dare you not take advantage of it in the early stages of your sickness? You just know you won't have anything to worry about, huh? Getting sicker the longer this goes on doesn't worry you because you're privileged enough to see a doctor whenever you want. You can afford to wait until it's almost too late! Fucking hooray for you, Angelica! I hope you enjoy basking in your advantage while other people are dead."_

_His chest was heaving by the time he finished. Not from speaking loudly but from venting so quickly. There was so much air leaving his body that he had to open his mouth. Breathing through just his nose wasn't sufficing. Angelica's bug eyes expression made his features soften._

_There was something sitting at the base of all that misplaced anger. Alexander was always a ticking time bomb but the man never exploded like that towards her. His words, his problem, went deeper than just her feeling a little queezy. It was bigger than her and her slight sickness. It was bigger than them. It was bigger than the whole damn country._

_Just behind Alexander's blazing eyes was fear. No matter how hard he tried to hide it with his hurtful monologue, Angelica could see it. Angelica could see him. Something in this world could actually make Alexander Hamilton feel afraid. Something that Angelica Schuyler had unknowing dragged up._

_"I'm so sorry, Alexander."_

_He deflated like a balloon right in front of her eyes. The fire burnt itself down to mere ashes. Smoked out and sullen._

_"No, I'm sorry. I-I shouldn't have blown up at you like that."_

_"It's not your fault." But it was... and it wasn't. This was bigger than Alexander being upset with is girlfriend._

_"Just please go to the hospital. Please." He reached out for her. Ignoring the gross residue on the front of her previously impressive dress. "I can't lose you." He whispered into her hair when she was in the circle of his arms. Sickness washed over her but Angelica clenched her gut and forced it down. "I can't keep losing people like this."_

_"Oh, Alexander, you're not going to lose me." She wished she had the courage right then to tell him that it was quite the opposite. Not only was he never going to lose her, he was going to be gaining someone else._

True to his word, Alexander was at her door exactly nineteen minutes later. Angelica was sitting on the edge of the couch waiting for his arrival. Yet she still jumped when the doorbell rang. By then Philip managed to go back to sleep. Now that he was no longer crying for his father, she felt like calling the man over was a mistake. Because Philip was in her bed resting. Which meant she would basically be alone in the house with her ex-lover. Breaking rule one for Eliza.  _No more secret meetings._ Though it really could not be counted as a secret. She  _did_ try calling her. And not to sound harsh, but her son's well-being was more essential to her than her little sister's feelings. It might sound cruel to say but it was true. The day she became a mother was the day Elizabeth became number two in her life.

Angelica was embarrassingly aware of how messy she looked as she walked to open the door. She was wearing last night's sweatpants because she didn't have the opportunity to take a shower. Even when her baby boy was sleeping, she was afraid for him to wake up and find her missing. Her t-shirt was stained with Philip's breakfast oatmeal and a couple of fun liquid medicine colors he'd spit out. She didn't want to think about how tired she looked or how her hair was tousled in every direction. Damn, she should have tied it up. 

She checked her wrist for a spare hair holder and stopped. Why should she try to fix herself up for Alexander? It should not matter how she looked. His opinion on her appearance was the last thing on her mind. Besides, he'd seen her in worse states. With that determined mindset, she swung the door open. 

Alexander didn't wait to be invited in. Angelica watched silently as he sped down the hall for Philip's room. He reappeared in the sitting area quickly enough.

"Where's Philip?"

"He's in my room." Alexander nodded. "Sleeping." She added to stop him from charging in there as well.

Another nod. "I'm just going to look at him. Make sure he's okay."

"Okay." 

A part of her wanted to follow just to make sure he didn't disturb him. But Alexander would take offense to being monitored so she returned to her sofa. The television was still playing re-runs of Paw Patrol. Angelica sat back and let her eyes wonder to the screen. Being forced to watch the cartoon every day helped her understand the characters and the general plot. So it wasn't hard to get into the episode. In this one the gang apparently had to make it snow for some Christmas concert. Chase and Martial, the police and fire fighter pups, were in charge of that mission. 

"I mean, it's still better than those serial killer documentaries you used to watch." 

She looked up just as Alexander took a seat beside her. Appearing more relaxed than when he walked in. Not that Alexander Hamilton ever really looked relaxed. His eyes were always tired, the bags under them dark as bruises. Yet somehow he managed to make it look appealing. At least his hair was brushed back neatly today. Actually, he looked overall well put together. Beige slacks with an emerald green, three button polo. It wasn't a tuxedo, but it also wasn't the usual jeans and t-shirt. Alexander wouldn't dress like that on a normal day. Her call must have interrupted something important.

"Did I call you at a bad time?"

He lifted an eyebrow at that. "No time is a bad time for my son."

Angelica rolled her eyes. Trying to ignore the butterflies his words set loose in her chest. She always wondered what kind of father Alexander would be. A part of her worried he'd fall into the patterns of his own paternal figure. Another part of her worried he'd do  _just enough_ to avoid being considered a deadbeat. She was happy to be wrong on both accounts. Though it'd only been a few months, Alexander was proving to be a great parent. His love for Philip was one only matched by her own. He was playful, attentive, encouraging and stern when necessary. Though sometimes it seemed like telling the boy no was a struggle for him. It was no wonder Philip became attached so quickly. Angelica had a similar dilemma.

"You know what i mean." Still she clarified. "Where you in the middle of something?"

"I was having lunch with a few co-workers." He shrugged it off. "Very casual thing."

"I don't think I've ever seen you dressed like this. You always wore jeans or a suit around me." _Or nothing at all_ her brain unhelpfully supplied. 

"I'm more confident in my career placement now." He grinned, flicking the collar of his shirt. "I don't feel like I have to one-up everyone in the room anymore."

"I'm glad you're in a good place."

"And you?" Alexander tucked one of his legs under himself when he twisted to face her. "Are you in a good place?"

Angelica focused on the TV. "I think so."

"Because you look like shit, Angel."

"Gee thanks." She slipped her hands under her thighs to avoid fixing her hair. 

"That's not what I meant. I only mean you look tired. Not that- look," She could feel him studying her. "You always look beautiful. All I'm saying is that today-"

"Don't say that." She warned. "I get what you're saying. You can stop now."

"Don't say what?" Alexander was genuinely puzzled by being cut off. He repeated his words in his head. Trying to understand why she suddenly went rigid. "Don't say you always look beautiful?"

"Yes."

"Why not? You do."

"Stop it." She hissed.

"Jesus fucking  _Christ,_  Angelica! I can't even give you a simple compliment? They're words. It's not like I'm stuffing my hands down your pants."

"Would you stop?" Her hard eyes turned on him. "It's bad enough we're in this house together-"

"That is so fucking stupid!" Alexander pushed off of the sofa to pace. Angelica knew she was in for an earful. A pacing Alexander was a thinking Alexander. A thinking Alexander was a talking Alexander. A talking Alexander never stopped. "Just because we had a thing three years ago I'm supposed to act like you don't exist? We can't even be friends? You're the mother of my child for crying out loud! This isn't what's best for our son. You don't think Philip notices that things are different? You don't think he sees how it went from the three of us spending time together to never seeing his parents in the same place?" He had a point. Philip was keenly observant. "The other day when Peggy dropped him off he asked if I was mad at you, Angelica." He paused to give her a long look. "He asked if we had a fight. I didn't know what to say to that. What was I supposed to say to that?" Alexander didn't give her time to actually answer. "What does a man say when his two year old son asks if he hates his mom?" He ran his hands through his hair. Pulling strands as he went. "And I miss spending time with you, Angel. We were building our bond back-"

"We can't  _bond,_ Alexander." She said the word like it was something sour. "You're dating my sister-"

"Elizabeth broke up with me!"

"What?" 

"You heard me the first time." 

"Y-You broke up?"

"Yes." He scowled.

"You didn't make up?"

"No." All his nervous energy left and he slumped back onto the couch. Closer to Angelica this time. His shoulder pushed against hers. Their thighs touched. "I don't know what I'm supposed to say to make it better." And then a nervous peek in Angelica's direction. "I don't know if I  _want_ to make it better."

"What?" She repeated dumbly.

Again, he responded with, "You heard me the first time."

Suddenly the couch was too crowded. Angelica jerked away from him. Putting some much needed space between them. "Why would you say that. Why wouldn't you want Eliza back?"

"You know why." He deadpanned. Holding her eyes just long enough to make her squirm. Angelica looked away first. How could she not? "I wish you would have told me." 

There was no need to ask what he was talking about. It was clear what her ex boyfriend wanted to discuss. As if the air wasn't already thick enough in the room. Angelica could see the battle happening just behind his coffee colored gaze. She knew that look well enough. He was debating whether he should leave things as they were or face the problem head on. Alexander exhaled through his nose. Decision made.

The conversation she ran from for three years was about to happen. She was unprepared for the war of words they were about to exchange. Angelica wished she would have received some warning. Then she would have had time to build up her defensive wall, assemble her army, purchase the proper weapons, steel herself for the casualties. Of course Alexander wasn't considerate or dumb enough to allow her the luxury. He was going into combat the same way he charge at everything in his life. Head first with no fear of consequence. She was starting this battle at a disadvantage. The quickest way to swing the odds in her favor was to strike first.

"I tried to tell you." Angelica turned her back to him. "I tried and you blew up at me."

_We had something to celebrate._

"Okay one, I did not blow up at you." He began ticking points off with his finger. "Two, you did  _not_ try to tell me." The couch scraped the wood of her floor. Protesting the force Alexander used to push up from it. "You walked into my apartment and began badgering me about eating and sleeping like I was a child."

"You'd been sitting in the same spot for days!"

"I was working on a big case!"

"You are a grown man. Practice efficient time management." If she was facing him, Angelica was sure Alexander's would look livid.

"I manage my time just fine.  _Thank you very much_!" 

"That's such a bold face lie it's almost funny." 

"You know what," His footsteps came closer. "Fuck you, Angelica!"

" _Excuse me_?" She spun around to find herself chest to chest with the man.

Alexander didn't back down when the venomous words were thrown at him. Angelica didn't expect him to. Not in this war.

"I told you about my problems with abandonment. I never told _anyone_ that. And what did you do? You ran away from me the moment shit got hard."

Angelica couldn't disguise her slack jawed reaction. She knew Alexander was a manipulative son of a bitch. But she didn't expect him to project his wrong doings onto her to make himself look the victim. Surprised disbelief left her gaping like a fish in air. A deadly cannon blow to her soldier's first defensive line. Harsh but not impossible to recover from. Her back straightened. Her second line of defense stepped onto the battle field.

"I did not run away from you. You pushed me away-  _no_ you practically dragged me away!"

"I said a few mean words in my sleep deprived state-"

"Telling me we never had a future is more than a few means words, Alexander. That's a relationship ending phrase!"

_I'm saying we don't have a future, Angelica._

"I was exhausted. Mentally and physically."

"You meant those fucking words. You know you did. I can still remember the look on your face when you finally got to say it."

"I wasn't alleviated, damn you. I was hurting just as much as you were."

"You don't get to say that." Angelica pushed against his chest with enough force to make him stumble. "Those words destroyed me. I put so much time and effort and emotion into you and you basically tell me I'm not capable of love." And there it was. The straw that broke the camel's back. The real reason Angelica hadn't so much as looked at a man since her son was born. The reason she could never truly forgive Alexander. "I gave my entire self to you and you turn around and tell me it's nothing? Of course I left! What choice did i have?"

"You could have stayed!" He shot back like it was common sense. As if that were the only thing she could have done. "It wasn't just about you anymore, Angelica. We were having a child!"

" _I_ was having a child! Me! You were being a child. You couldn't even take care of yourself for a few days. How the hell was I supposed to think you could take care of a child?" Angelica's firing squad unleashed a spray of bullets. Down went Alexander's defense. One for one. The war was at a standstill. Angelica waited to see what his general's next maneuver would be. 

"That wasn't your decision to make!"

"Like hell it wasn't!"

"He was my child too!" His voice boomed through the room with enough power to make her ears ring. Angelica visibly startled. The blast was lethal. Leaving half of her army withering, bloody messes on the ground. Alexander noticed the woman in front of him retreating into herself. With an almost silent swear under his breath, he latched onto her. Steadying her with his own shaking hands. Running onto the gruesome field waving a white flag. "I'm sorry." His whisper was just as disquieting as his scream. "I shouldn't have raised my voice like that."

"I-stop touching me." Angelica shook out of his hold. A battle won in surrender was still a battle hard won. 

He let his arms drop to his side. Though he'd fairly given up, though Angelica could consider herself the victor in this battle, the war wasn't over. She expected Alexander to aid his own loss with more words. Be they words of anger or words of apology. She expected-

"I never wanted to be a father."

Not that. 

Immediate offense was taken for both herself and her child. "I never asked you to be a father."

_Alexander, let it go._

_It doesn't matter._

_Nothing's going to change._

"It was something I never thought about." He continued past her interruption. "That was mostly because of my own missing paternal figure. I could never think any positive thing to associate with the word 'father'. Until I saw Philip. The moment I knew he was mine something shifted inside of me, Angelica. The feeling can't be described in any language I know. I don't think words strong enough have been spoken on any part of the globe."

"I know what you mean." She admitted quietly. When her crying mess of a baby was sat on her chest in that delivery room, Angelica had been stunned speechless.

"I went from never thinking about having a child to never thinking about anything else in the span of a second. It wasn't until I was crying in bed that night did I realize it wasn't just becoming a father that moved me to tears." He reached for her again. Slower this time. Cuffing the curve of her elbow. Trailing down the skin of her arm until their fingers brushed. Angelica was helpless to do anything but stare. "It was the fact that  _you_ made me a father, Angel."

"You've always been so good at pretty words." Angelica spoke to their hands. "The man with the golden tongue." It took all her self control not to melt when she allowed their eyes to connect. "But pretty words aren't enough for me anymore, Alexander. I'm happy you love Philip. Hell, I'm happy you're the man I had him with. But I refuse to find myself whirl winded into the hurricane that is Alexander Hamilton again. No matter how calm it appears to be in the eye. When you walked in with my sister that day, any chance of us rekindling died.

"I didn't know she was your sister. I didn't know you _had_ a sister. If I had known there was even the possibility of me seeing you-"

"Hindsight is a bitch."

Alexander examined her face for any sign that she would give in. He found no such weakness. "The worst kind of bitch."

Angelica slid her hand away from his. "We have to move on from each other."

"I don't want to."

"You don't have a choice."

"I'm not going to." Everything was a challenge to Alexander Hamilton. "I waited three years-"

"You didn't wait."

"So I made a mistake."

"How dare you call my sister a mistake. Elizabeth loves you."

"That's not how I meant it."

Because he didn't know what he _did_ mean, he remained silent. 

She sighed. "I'm going to check on Philip." 

Angelica stepped around him. His shallow footsteps trailed behind her into the room. They paused when they saw the small boy sitting at the edge of the bed. His feet dangling beside the mattress. Fever had flushed his face pink. His eyes, so alert, so perceptive, _so Alexander_ , watched Angelica enter first. They brightened at the sight of Alexander but only briefly.

"Sunshine." His dad approached. Sitting beside him to pull the warm boy onto his lap. "Are you okay?" He brushed his thumb over his round cheeks. "Have you been crying?"

"You were crying?" His mother rushed to his side. Resisting the urge to snatch him from Alexander and make sure he was alright. "What's wrong? Does something hurt? How long have you been awake? Why didn't you come or call for me?"

He sniffed. "You and daddy were yelling loud."

"I'm so sorry, sunshine." Alexander blanched. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"Do you hate mommy?"

Angelica's stilled. Hearing Alexander tell her he asked was one thing. Hearing it with her own ears was heartbreaking.

"I could never hate mommy."

"Then why are you fighting?"

"Philip, baby, sometimes grown ups have really loud conversations when they get upset. That doesn't mean they hate each other."

"Like you and auntie Peggy?"

She laughed lightly. "Yes." Angelica pressed her lips to her boy's cheek, noting the fever was still present. "Just like that."

"You don't hate daddy?"

"No."

"You love daddy?"

His father answered before she could. Not that she had anything helpful to say. "Just know we both love you very much."

"And each other." Philip wasn't deterred. "And everything is okay because it's Philip and mommy and daddy."

Alexander met her eyes over their son's head. The  _I told you so_ hanging in the air.

"Everything is okay." Angelica assured him. Brushing his hair behind his ear with one hand and drying his face with the other. Whether her sisters liked it or not,  _this_ is what was best for her son.

"Because it's Philip and mommy and daddy." She didn't have to look away from their son. She could  _hear_ the smile in Alexander's voice. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading that. I hope you enjoyed it. Feel free to yell at me in the comments or to just tell me what you think.  
> I've already started the next part and SPOILER ALERT it's going to feature the jealous Alex some of you have been waiting for.  
> But don't worry, Hamgelica is always my end game at heart.  
> Also I need more Alexander/Angelica fics to read so you guys need to start writing too!


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